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Poor wretch(el): The rain cape that never came in the rain

23.12.2022

Translation: machine translated

It all started with a very attentive colleague and great joy when unpacking. But as life goes, I ended up standing in the rain. And the cape was at home.

It was weeks ago, maybe months, that I asked around within my editorial team if anyone could recommend a good rain jacket. I approached Bardelli with particular anticipation - after all, the man is on the road 24/7 on his gravel bike or otherwise outdoors in some other way and is very familiar with all weather conditions. He expertly listed a few reliable brands, I listened gratefully, forgot all about them shortly afterwards and looked just as silly as ever during the next autumn-winter shower. It was my own fault.

Challenge number one

But as if the universe had wanted to give me a second chance in the matter of rain protection, a short time later my name was randomly picked out for colleague Bardelli during the team Secret Santa. Jackpot, because out of its packaging I peeled... a cape! Huge, squeaky yellow and WATERPROOF. The first order of business, still in the office: try it out. It's so spacious that I can fit a bike, my dog or half of our team under it. Now nothing can go wrong, I think as I take it off and immediately realise: it's not. How am I ever going to squeeze this yellow six-man tent back into the small bag it came with?

Anyone who has ever wanted to fold up a map or a leaflet properly knows the Struggle. "Challenge number one", it sounds (somewhat mockingly) across the office desk. It looks like this. I kneel on the floor and do my best. Even if it's rather bad than good, somehow it works - the thing is stowed away. Now quickly home.

Normalerweise soll das Runde ins Eckige. Hier im besten Fall das Grosse ins Kleine …

Challenge number two

Superman can fly with his cape, Harry Potter becomes invisible with his, I brave all weathers with mine. At least that's the modest, theoretical plan for our adventures together. Only... In practice, it quickly becomes clear: Whenever I need it most, my cape is always where it is of least use to me: at home. Superman and Harry Potter somehow have a better handle on that. While one of them seems to wear his cape underneath all the time (which is difficult in terms of layering), the other can simply conjure his up when needed (I don't see that happening). And me? I'll get wet again. Shit. If Patrick finds out. Better not tell him, I'll keep my mouth shut. My jackets don't. Again and again I am literally standing in the rain.

Am I actually failing challenge number two? The simple "think about the cape"? It looks like it. And that's despite the fact that I do manage to stow the cape in my suitcase for my December stay in Berlin. But there it is. From the frying pan into the fire, so to speak. From the Zurich wardrobe into the Berlin suitcase. Not even plucked out of its handy carrier bag.

Auch sinnvoll platziert: das Cape im Koffer. — Mein Cape fristet ein Leben im Schrank.

Shame (and rain) on my head

Patrick, you've tried. Several times. Thanks. I will work on my flat learning curve. Promise. Maybe the Cape and I will manage a joint outing by next festival season at the latest. Or I'll donate it to Harry. I think it would be in good hands there.

Jackets

CHF18.90

Rukka Eva

One size

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Laura Scholz

Senior Editor

Laura.Scholz@digitecgalaxus.ch

Always in the mood for good hits, great trips and clinking drinks.

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