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With male plants against progress
8.7.2020
Translation: machine translated
Pictures: Thomas Kunz
All of Europe is occupied by the armies of gender equality. All of Europe? No, a company occupied by unbending flower brokers will not stop resisting progress.
A few days ago, the Netherlands decided to remove gender information from identity cards from 2024. People should be able to develop their identity freely. This can be welcomed as a step in the right direction. As a sign that qualifications, character and world view do not correlate with gender identity. But it can also be dismissed as superfluous occupational therapy for underemployed politicians. After all, biologically there are two genders. In written language, there is one. That's the way it is and always has been. Or you could just give plants a gender instead, if you're already denying it to us humans.
Hooray for the 50s
While the rest of us are still looking for arguments and slogans to throw at dissenters in the gender equality debate, a savvy flower broker is secretly getting down to business. Fleurop is not in the mood for debate and echoes. So it simply assigns plants a gender and breathes life into them with role models from the 1950s to make its opinion known. An ingenious marketing stunt in 2020. With all the progress in terms of racism and sexism, it is important to also celebrate the regression.
The idea behind the new "Männerpflanze" line is characterised by its simplicity. Men are notoriously lazy and not exactly blessed with green fingers. Their bachelor pads are decorated with dirty underwear because the last visit to mum's house was cancelled due to alcohol-induced headaches. Women are not very fond of this. They love green stuff. Not just as a treat on International Women's Day or in a healthy smoothie, but also in men's homes.
So how can lazy watering be combined with the urgent desire for coital satisfaction? Of course, by giving the easiest-to-care-for plants male names, placing them in masculine concrete pots and then offering the whole thing at three times the price. And then you have the new holy trinity of male potency symbols: Rolex on the wrist. Porsche 911 in the garage. Monstera next to the sofa. If, contrary to expectations, this does not lead to the sexual act, then, dear men, a little consolation from Fleurop: just be glad that you don't have to share your flat with rebellious women who are offended by your enthusiasm for sport. Plants keep their mouths shut and look pretty. It's been a long time since men could say that about women.
Social stagnation is part of Switzerland
Sophisticated debaters may now argue that sexism is directed against both genders, which is why it actually disappears. Minus times minus equals plus, that's simple maths. In addition, Switzerland has never been particularly open to social progress, which is impressively demonstrated by the fact that women's suffrage only came into force in 1971. The socio-political standstill is as Swiss as William Tell or the Stewi. For some, it even gives rise to a feeling of national pride in their swelling chests. But it's not just the Swiss parliament that is woke as never before (hello marriage for all. And TWO weeks paternity leave! Maybe.), but also the Galaxus community - unlike us as a shop. They won't be taken for fools and criticise the clumsy use of gender stereotypes.
In 2020, with all its strikes, demonstrations and a pandemic that is currently exposing all kinds of abuses, Fleurop seems to have gambled too high with a sexist product line. Maybe next year. <p
My life in a nutshell? On a quest to broaden my horizon. I love discovering and learning new skills and I see a chance to experience something new in everything – be it travelling, reading, cooking, movies or DIY.
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