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With the fixie to Morocco #5: "Guys, where can we get cocaine?"

Jonathan Perraudin und Christoph Zuidema

14.9.2018

Translation: machine translated

After their final university exams, Jonathan and Christoph head out into the world. Not on an all-inclusive holiday to the Canary Islands, but to Morocco pretty much without anything - just with fixies and light luggage. Here they report on their experiences. This time: bad weather, strange acquaintances and a happy ending.

Sometimes, no matter how thoroughly the stage is prepared, certain higher powers cannot be controlled. For example, the weather reports in Spanish daily newspapers are always in Spanish and, with the best will in the world, we don't speak the language. So one day we set off south of Valencia expecting normal Spanish weather (30°C, sunshine - as usual). Instead, dark clouds gather and it slowly starts to pour. Well, as true adventurers, we don't let ourselves be put off, unpack the rain jacket, drive on in the pouring rain and are happy to finally have clean clothes again as a side effect.

The lightning strikes

But when the rain slowly turns into a proper thunderstorm, lightning strikes a pole next to the road twenty metres away from us and we unfortunately haven't fitted the fixie lightning conductor package, we stop off at the nearest café in a small village with our adrenaline levels high.

In the rain, someone asks for snow

Unbeknownst to us, we watch as a hire car approaches in serpentine lines. The driver parks with difficulty in front of the café. Three figures in their mid-thirties, who would have won any 3-day-without-sleep competition, get out. They sit down next to us. After they have each drunk half a litre of beer (wait, there must be one of the drivers!) in record time, one of the group comes up to us and asks us something in Spanish. We don't understand anything, but notice his English accent and reply with a Swiss German accent: "Sorry, what do you mean?"

And he says: "Guys, where can we get cocaine?"

Sex, Drugs and Isostar

We first want to sell him our Isostar powder and dream of great wealth, but find that his teeth look like they can't take another gram of sugar. Otherwise they'll dissolve for good. So we reply: "No idea, we're not from here." When he then asks about pleasure girls, we think of the road we discovered in Spain at the very beginning, but say nothing. The gentlemen have enough to do with themselves.

As the rain subsides and the rumble of thunder can only be heard from afar, we set off again after an hour and a half break. Pedalling furiously, we realise that despite our incredible muscle power, we won't make it to Alicante today. In the endless wasteland in which we find ourselves, the only place to spend the night is a wellness temple. Once again, we dream of turning our Isostar powder into money, but we only book a broom cupboard for two and at least we get a wellness entrance fee. How beautiful life can be.

So the wet is fun again! — We've had enough for today.

What else happened:

Background information
With the fixie to Morocco #7: Land in sight!
by Jonathan Perraudin und Christoph Zuidema

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Jonathan Perraudin und Christoph Zuidema

aurel.stevens@gmail.com

We're setting off from Zurich this summer, trying our hand at skidding with fixies, racing over mountain passes and not stopping again until we've reached the beach in Morocco.

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