«Happy New Year» on loop. Do I really have to play along every year?

Katja Fischer

5.1.2023

Translation: Jessica Johnson-Ferguson

The new year is only a few days old and I’ve already had my fill of hearing «Happy New Year». My resolution? Less wishing, more asking.

Did I already say it? Not yet? Is it okay not to? My new years always start with a question mark. And with a realisation. I’ve had my fill since January third.

I’m talking about hearing «Happy New Year».

Dear friends, family and team members, please don’t hate me. I really wish you all the best, honest! But as soon as the New Year – and that’s us included – no longer smells of empty champagne bottles, I think we should stop wishing each other a «Happy New Year».

Instead, we reel off the hollow phrase every year over and over again. This madness starts at twelve on the dot on New Year’s Eve and lasts until mid-January at least. And this doesn’t just go for our nearest and dearest. We even wish that old school friend we bump into on the street a «Happy New Year». As well as that colleague who barely speaks when you bump into them at the coffee machine. Not to mention the neighbour you only cross paths with in the stairwell twice a year tops. And all of this in the name of good manners? Must I really?

What the etiquette expert says

«No», was her reply when I asked her if I must. According to Susanne Abplanalp of «Knigge Today», it’s fine not to wish someone a happy new year if you only know them in passing. Nevertheless, in her eyes, it’s a «beautiful custom» that she recommends continuing – «provided it’s from the heart,» she adds.

But that’s precisely the crux of the matter. Except for your nearest and dearest, of course, does wishing someone a happy new year ever come from the heart? Isn’t it pretty much always just a hollow phrase?

«Yes, unfortunately, that’s true some of the time,» Susanne Abplanalp partially agrees. It’s a tendency she’s noticed in shops, hotels and restaurants. «You can tell if it’s from the heart by the way the other person makes eye contact, or if there’s joy in their voice.»

And yet, she insists there’s a positive aspect to this custom. Namely, as an icebreaker and a topic for small talk. She says that good New Year’s wishes are a driver of further questions. «What are your goals, hopes or projects for the new year?» she gives as examples.

«How’s your New Year been so far?»

Topics of conversation served on a silver platter, so to speak. Good point. As far as I’m concerned, we could skip the initial phrase and get straight to the point. By that I don’t mean heavy questions about the future that sound like something you’d hear during a job interview. No, what I’m talking about are heartfelt follow-up questions that might even come across as a bit unspectacular.

For example, how about simply asking, «How’s the new year been for you so far?» Or even, «How bad was your New Year’s hangover?» What counts is being sincere. Showing genuine interest. And if you’re not genuinely interested, I believe it’s better to do without the New Year’s questions and wishes altogether.

Therefore, my New Year’s resolution is: less wishing, more asking. The first test run has been great so far. While everyone wished a team member who’d just returned from their holidays a «Happy New Year» during our editorial meeting, I asked him how he’d celebrated the turn of the year. His response resulted in a lovely chat about detective games, New Year’s Eve as you get older and alcohol. We even got a Galaxus story idea from the conversation.

By the way, I get to test this rephrasing of things until mid-January. Because that’s how long it’s acceptable to wish each other a Happy New Year, says etiquette expert Susanne Abplanalp. Having said that, it’s not a rule set in stone, but merely a recommendation.

Katja Fischer

Senior Editor

Katja.Fischer@digitecgalaxus.ch

Mom of Anna and Elsa, aperitif expert, group fitness fanatic, aspiring dancer and gossip lover. Often a multitasker and a person who wants it all, sometimes a chocolate chef and queen of the couch.

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