Valhall Highlanders
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Woman power at the Highland Games: carrying tree trunks and archery for the first time

At the Highland Games, I shoot stones, arrows and tree trunks around – or at least I try to. At my first competition, I’m taking part in the championships with a women’s team.

Until recently, the Highland Games were unfamiliar territory. When a friend asked if I wanted to join a women’s team with her, I first had to say: pardon? After a brief explanation, I was thrilled. I only found out later why there are only a few women in this sport.

Of kings and warriors: the history of the Highland Games

The events vary in type and quantity depending on the location, but they’re similar. I’m taking part in the Highland Games Hasenstrick in Zurich, where there are eleven events. Here’s a rough overview:

  • weight over the bar
  • log obstacle course (varient on traditional caber toss)
  • shot put
  • farmer’s walk (carrying 2 × 25 kg)
  • caber toss
  • obstacle course
  • archery
  • axe throwing
  • log pulling/tyre pulling
  • two surprise events

The website (in German) roughly explains the disciplines but my head is still ringing alarm bells. What do you mean stones, axes, LOGS? My friend’s brief explanation was probably too brief.

My preparation: hardly any

Josi (my friend) had mainly asked me because I was the sportiest woman in her friendship group. Even without the flattery, I’d have agreed as I actually like the sporty challenges. After studying all the events in more detail, I put together a kind of workout plan. Or as well as you can with gym and home workout equipment.

I end up doing one of my typical full-body workouts, but with a backpack full of weights. I only have two weeks until the Highland Games anyway. That’s not enough for serious preparation, but too much to make me nervous and question my life decisions until then. Josi reassures me that others are also taking part for the first time. In the meantime, my motto is: being there is all that matters.

The people: a huge feel-good group

On the day, when Josi and I get to Zurich Oberland (the Zurich Highlands), we’re met with the kind of warm friendliness I rarely encounter. We’re instructed and kitted out by the Berner Clan Walhall Highlanders (site in German). A kilt is, of course, compulsory. We also get shirts with the stylish Berner Clan logo, so we’re ready to go.

Before the march-in and start of the events, we chat to the Walhall Highlanders as well as other people from opposing clans. There’s a high-spirited atmosphere. What’s quite special about this day is that there are only two women’s groups competing. Not only that, the opposing team has travelled from Germany and therefore can’t be crowned Swiss champions. So only we can win. A refreshing change that keeps my nervousness somewhat in check.

The atmosphere: welcome to the romanticised Middle Ages

He holds a large quaich in his hand – a traditional drinking vessel from Scotland – and explains that it’s only for strong spirits. Everyone is meant to take a sip in turn and the rest is tipped into the meadow in memory of the deceased. It’s kind of nice, but the whiskey is already soaking up the heat when I just smell it and pass it on without having taken a swig.

Now I’m ready for anything. I think.

How the competition unfolds: using brains, muscles and footwork

One surprise event in particular requires a lot of planning and discussion: we have to transport a large rabbit from A to B as quickly as possible. The rabbit is made up of a tractor tyre, wooden ears and paws and a huge stone as a pom-pom tail. Only one participant is allowed to carry a piece at a time. This requires a plan for sequencing and a division of labour. It’s worth it, though, as we’re among the fastest of all the groups.

At first I think I have to show pure muscle power with the caber toss. But it actually requires something totally different. The caber is over three metres long. You need to carry it to a line and then throw it so it rolls over once and goes as far as possible. My problem is balance. The trunk isn’t just long, it’s also much thicker at the top than the bottom.

This discipline highlighted how friendly the clanspeople are. It doesn’t matter if I’m in their clan or an opposing one, everyone just wants me to get it right. I’m cheered on, get tips and help from all sides and receive thunderous applause for my (pitiful) attempt – with two more tries to go. To give you an idea, here’s my best attempt:

I feel pretty cool after this discipline, if only for having brought myself to do it. When I then summon up enough courage to throw a heavy weight into the air over my head in the weight over the bar event, I’m finally full of adrenaline and dopamine.

The fact that I get so much encouragement and support helps to get over the fact I’m doing everything for the first time. So, I get to celebrate a few successes with my group after all.

Although most of the events are incredibly strenuous, which is exacerbated by the heat, we always do our best. In the log obstacle course, we beat the other women’s team by a few seconds on the second run.

The view: beautiful and needs to be seen again

At the award ceremony, the situation with the women’s teams is explained and the German group is automatically eliminated. Which was actually pretty mean. It makes us the winners despite being seven points down. But still: 319 points against 326 for a team that has known most of the events far longer than us.

In any case, we’re more pleased about the fact that we successfully mastered our first Highland Games without any injuries and that we get a gift basket with delicious jams and cakes. We definitely had a lot of fun and are now shattered and looking forward to a cold shower.

Header image: Valhall Highlanders

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In my world, Super Mario chases Stormtroopers with a unicorn and Harley Quinn mixes cocktails for Eddie and Peter at the beach bar. Wherever I can live out my creativity, my fingers tingle. Or maybe it's because nothing flows through my veins but chocolate, glitter and coffee. 


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