Why is my child not sleeping?
Unfortunately, I can't answer this question for you. But I can tell you that you are not alone! The fact that a child doesn't sleep is unfortunately a taboo subject in our society. Nobody wants to admit that their own child has a sleep problem.
Thousands of parents despair almost every evening because their little sunshine doesn't want to sleep. The dark circles under the chin, the eyelids almost close, the body is tired. There are hardly any nice thoughts left and the pressure of what else to do becomes more and more imprinted on the brain. The initial patience seems to slowly disappear over time and your mood slowly becomes gloomy. On the one hand, you try to remain strong and patient in order to gently accompany your child to sleep. On the other hand, your body is getting more and more tired and your nerves are getting thinner and thinner.
Believe me, you are not alone with this problem! Unfortunately, it's still often a taboo subject in Switzerland. People simply don't talk about it or trivialise a child's poor sleeping situation. After all, who wants to admit that they can't cope with such a condition? For many parents, it is a sign of weakness. But don't even think that far. Because it's precisely these thoughts that won't help you to get a sleep disorder under control. Constant sleep deprivation because the child doesn't fall asleep or sleep through the night simply pushes a person to their limits at some point. Add to this a cold, fever, stomach flu or similar and you've hit the jackpot. It is important to know that a child does not yet understand that sleeping is good, that it helps them to relax and process the day. They are often afraid of being alone, afraid of the dark and afraid that their parents won't be there when they wake up.
Unfortunately, neither a one-size-fits-all remedy nor a single piece of advice can help with the sleep problem. The well-meant tips from family or friends may give you an idea of what other solutions you could try. However, they do not help in every case. Sleeping has to be learnt and, depending on the child, this can be a long process and is never the same. Not even with siblings. And in most cases, the problem is not with the child anyway, but with the parents. For example, a lack of or incorrect rituals, unstable family relationships, eternal exceptions, stress, moving house, digital media consumption, a lonely place to sleep, a lack of security or different caregivers can unconsciously influence a child and promote a sleep disorder or cause it to develop in the first place.
From my own experience, I know that it can be very stressful and time-consuming for parents to resolve such a sleep problem. A sweet little angel during the day who still has enough energy to romp around on the bed in the evening despite all the activities during the day. The evening becomes a nervous act. Sometimes carrying him around for a long time helps him to fall asleep. Sometimes driving helps. In other cases, rearranging the bed, singing nursery rhymes, adjusting bedtime, introducing rituals, buying night lights or humming cuddly toys can help. We've already tried a few things. Perseverance and patience are the be-all and end-all. You could also try osteopathy or sleep counselling at 1001kindernacht. Hopefully, the sleep problem will be solved at some point, following the motto "Everything is just a phase". So hang in there dear parents, you're not alone.
10 ritual ideas that might help you
- Strict mealtimes
- Always bathe at the same time
- Wear pyjamas
- Read a story
- Drink milk
- Brushing teeth
- Switch on bedside lamp
- Sing a night song
- Exchange endearments
- Review the day together
I’m the cook, cleaner, police officer, nurse, entertainer, motivator, author, storyteller, coach, organiser, chauffeur, lawyer and judge. To put it simply, I’m a mum to a daughter and not just a (Content) Manager at the office but also at home.