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Star Wars – The Last Jedi review: a saga turns into a legend
by Dominik Bärlocher
Do we really need Star Wars razors? The comparison shows: Yes, we do. Absolutely.
14.12.2017
Translation: machine translated
Disney is quite liberal in the distribution of Star Wars merchandise rights. There is nothing that doesn't have Darth Vader or a Stormtrooper on it. The latest iteration: Star Wars razors.
This is Obi-Wan Kenobi in "Star Wars - Episode III: Revenge of the Sith".
Ewan McGregor plays the bearded Obi-Wan
This is Obi-Wan Kenobi in "Star Wars - Episode IV: A New Hope".
Alec Guinness as Obi-Wan Kenobi
This is Mark Hamill as Luke Skywalker in "Star Wars - Episode VIII: The Last Jedi"
Mark Hamill as wise old Jedi Luke Skywalker
What do the three of them have in common? They don't use razors. They have lightsabres and fly around in spaceships that can complete the Kessel Run in under 12 parsecs, but they don't have a razor.
The solution for Jedi
Disney thinks that's a bit daft. So does Philips. Because razors are things that can be sold. Razors are things that a non-Jedi should buy, unless they take good care of their beard. You look good with a razor, Disney makes some licence money and Philips makes revenue. Everyone wins and your face is as delicate as Darth Vader's head in "Star Wars - Episode VI: Return of the Jedi".
Darth Vader without his iconic helmet. He has suffered severe burns on the planet Mustafar
Voilà.
The comparison shows: exact film replica
Critical voices are now asking what this is all about. Because does a razor necessarily have to be a Star Wars licence product?
"Yes", at least according to Disney and Philips. And produce razors that look like characters from the Star Wars universe, according to the advertising copy. According to our product management, the razors "embody a character from the films". Even!
Let's put that to the test.
No difference, is there?
You know who's most likely to need the razor, though? Rey, played by Daisy Ridley. When photoshopping the pictures above, I noticed that her legs are silky smooth. Free tip for Philips: Star Wars Ladyshave.
Or, dear women, just use men's razors. In some cases, they're a little cheaper.
So, that's it. Have fun with Star Wars.
Journalist. Author. Hacker. A storyteller searching for boundaries, secrets and taboos – putting the world to paper. Not because I can but because I can’t not.
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