Bumblebee Stupid

The Jaud reads the novel "Row 12 was the last one allowed to choose between tortellini and chicken. I was sitting in row 13. It should have been clear to me on the outbound flight that the annual vacation was turning into a nightmare."

Who is to blame for everything is clear to Matze anyway: his girlfriend Sina. While he was busy negotiating the new condominium, she was supposed to just book "something." And she did. But this "something" had to be a two-week group trip through Namibia, a country where every hip-replacement tortoise is faster than the internet? What did he do to deserve being crammed into a minibus full of crazies every day, only to be jostled to Austrian pop songs over African gravel roads? And why is he stumbling through the Kalahari dunes in a silly hiking hat at minus two degrees instead of sipping a beer in Mallorca? When Matze is then reminded that the supposedly secure apartment will go to other buyers if he doesn't transfer the five thousand euro reservation fee immediately, he suddenly has three new problems: the nearest internet café is five hundred kilometers away, his phone battery is dead, and the only charger is firmly in Austrian hands.

"I press my nose against the bus window and look out at the vast land. The Namibians wave at us and laugh. Of course, they laugh; they are free. We are not. We are the tin-packed revenge for the German colonial era.".