Liebesbeziehungen

Otto F. Kernberg examines how the individual psychopathology of partners in dyadic relationships can lead to the dominance of narcissism, masochism, sadism, or a superego pathology in their shared sexuality, illustrating these maladaptive developments with case examples from his practice.

However, Kernberg also views a successful, mature loving relationship with a fulfilling shared sexuality as a delicate balancing act. This is because it inevitably awakens internalized object relations from childhood that push for reenactment with the partner and can lead to destructive conflicts. On the other hand, the sexual relationship can only remain vibrant if the lovers are capable of unconsciously consenting to draw upon polymorphously perverse aspects of childhood sexuality. Equally essential is the subtle interplay of love and aggression between the partners.

Above all, a mature loving relationship is founded on overcoming Oedipal fears and inhibitions and on the willingness to engage with and transcend the forbidden identification with the Oedipal couple, that is, with one's own parents, which resides in the unconscious. This step also carries the potential for conflict: a fulfilling sexuality places the couple in opposition to their social and cultural environment, which is always dominated by a conventional moral sense stemming from the latency phase.